What Does He Mean...

You Say “I Love You. He Says “Let’s Be FWB”

So, you did it. You confess your love to this guy that you have had your eyes and mind on for quite some time. You have been praying and hoping that he felt the same way that you did. It took you a while, but you finally worked up the nerve to proclaim your love. Then, what does he do? Instead of saying that he feels the same way or letting you know that he doesn’t, he suggesting being friends with benefits. What is up?

Okay, siesta. I love you so I will tell you the truth. He means that he likes your body. Maybe he is lonely. Either ways, he has evaluated you and decided that he would like to have sex with you. Same thing as I love you, right? Wrong. At least, he likes me, right? Wrong, again. He doesn’t like you as a person. He likes what he thinks your body can do for him. He likes the prospect of getting you home for dessert. No, he is not considering you as girlfriend or wife material. He is considering you a willing victim. A volunteer to his drama. Don’t fall for it. Don’t agree. Don’t stoop to this level thinking things will change once the two of you hook up. It won’t.

Men place women in categories: girlfriend material, wife material, doable, doable when my boys aren’t around, and no way. You are on his “doable” list. Not one of the first two.

So, what should you do? Tell him, “Thanks but no thanks”, go home have a good cry, and begin to move on. If he comes back later, check to see where his mind is at. If he is ready for a commitment, go for it. But, don’t go along with the game. As my brothers, Stanley and Maurice, love to say “There are no victims in this game, only willing volunteers.” Don’t be a lamb led to the slaughter. Realize you are worth more than that.