What Does He Mean When He Says...You're a Nice Girl...You Deserve Better?

 

 

Okay. Some of us have heard these words from the man in our life, and we have wondered just what he meant. In fact, some of us have grab the phone and called our girlfriends for answers. Sadly, all she can tell us is that we are “nice” or that we are “good girls”. Why are we so confused? First, our boo said this without explaining. Second, he said this and didn’t officially break up with us. So, we are left hanging.

When we ask our man about it later, we are not given a straight answer. Sometimes, he may even play dumb and pretend that he doesn’t remember saying these words. So, ladies allow me to enlighten you.
As a woman who has been there and done that, I have just about heard it all. To be honest, I have just about said it all too. Guilty…Guilty…Guilty as charged. When your significant other tells you how nice you are, he means it. You are a nice person. Yeah! Great, right!? Maybe.

When this statement is followed by the acknowledgment that you can do better, you better look out. His hands have been in the cookie jar, and his conscious is acting up. He is tell you in so many words that he has done you wrong and that you are too good for his junk.

Why hasn’t he broken up with you? Simple. You are too good to lose. He doesn’t want to willingly let you go. But, he is not ready to stop doing the crap that he is doing. He still wants to play the field and run home to you. Sometimes, when he is caught red-handed and given an ultimatum, he may even chose to let you go.

How to I know? Because I have been in the same situation. To be honest, I have even told guys this same thing after I have been wading in the mud with my man on the side. I would come back from my rendezvous and realize that I had a good man at home.

So, why would I cheat? Why would your man cheat when he knows that you are a good woman? For the same reasons everybody does:

·         Having an affair can be exciting.

·         Things are a little rocky at home or in the relationship with you. A lover welcomes us with open arms and doesn’t want to know when we are going to pay the bills or stop hanging out with our friends.

·         Things in the bedroom may have gotten boring.

·         He or she makes us feel special. They tell us how beautiful we are. They act like we are the most important person in the world.

So, now you know. What should you do?  Try to have a heart to heart talk with your partner. But, be prepared for him to deny everything.

How to Flirt like a Southern Belle Style

 

Southern women are known for their drawl, their charm, and their flirtatious nature. They can stop a man dead in his tracks with just one look, and they can woo him before he even bats his eyes. If you have ever watched Gone with the Wind, then you have seen a southern belle in action. Scarlett O’Hara was an infamous flirt. How do southern women do it? The following is a guide to flirting southern belle style.

The Eyes Have It

Flirting begins with the eyes. All good southern girls learn from an early age how to make her eyes work for her. And, those eyes don’t have to be blue. All you need to know is how to “smize” (smile with your eyes~a term coined by supermodel Tyra Banks). The first thing you will need to do is look directly at your target. Make your eyes as wide as you can. Then, slowly drop them half way. Go from his eyes to his shoulders and then back up to his eyes again. Raise one of your eyebrows and make your eyes smile. It doesn’t hurt to bat them once or twice. It is also a good idea to know how to wear the right eye make up for maximum effect.

The Lips Say It All

A woman’s lips also play an important part in the flirting process. Let your lips work for you. Once you have his attention, smile. Don’t give him a big silly smile. Make it subtle. The smile should begin in one corner of your mouth like a smirk and then let it go all the way around. Lipstick and lip gloss are your friends. Don’t be afraid to use some. They can help to make your lips exciting.

Talk to Me

Once you have captured him with your eyes and drew him in with your lips, you should then strike up a conversation. You can start it out with something as simple as a “Hello”.  Find something of mutual interest and have a nice, casual conversation. A good southern flirt will center the conversation around the man she is talking to. So, let him talk about himself or things that interest him. Be sure to look either wide-eyed or dreamy eyed.  Act like he is the most important person in the world at that moment.

Touch My Heart

During the course of the conversation, gently touch his arm. Don’t grab him. Make the touch light. It should seem “natural”.

Learning to Walk Away

Finally, a southern girl knows when to walk away. Don’t let the conversation go on too long. Remember, you want to give him something to think about. Leave him wanting more. Politely, excuse yourself. If he is still interested, he will ask for your number or any other way that he can contact you.

Southern women are known for their ability to flirt. Their words drip like honey, and men flock to them. Follow the steps listed above and flirt like a southern belle.

Gift Ideas for Football Fans

Great gift ideas for Football fans

Can’t think of what to get that special person in your life?  Do they love football? If they do, then finding a gift just got easier. The items below make great gifts for any football fan.

*Collapsible quad chair

Who couldn’t use a collapsible quad chair? These are great to use when sitting near the field or to use during those tailgating parties. They are generally inexpensive, and because they are collapsible, they can be taken anywhere.  You can make this chair extra special by purchasing one with your football fan’s favorite team logo on it. 

*Clappers, Cowbells, and Pompoms

Any good football fan will need a noise maker to use when their team makes that touchdown.  Mississippi State University fans use cowbells, but there are other items that are just as much fun. You can have specially designed team clappers or bam bams for your football enthusiast. If your football fan happens to be a female or you don’t want a noise maker, you can opt for pompoms in team colors.

*Team t-shirts and sweatshirts

Team t-shirts are cute and they are a fantastic way to show off that school pride. They go well with jeans, shorts, and turtlenecks. Don’t forget those warm and cozy team sweatshirts. They are perfect for the game and the cold weather.

*Hats and gloves

Football is a cold weather sport. Help keep your football fan warm while they are sitting in the stands with both a warm hat and a pair of gloves. If your football fan likes a professional team, you can find these with team logos also.

*Electric smoker (tailgating)

Tailgating and football go hand in hand. If your football fan likes to tailgate, then an electric smoker can be an ideal gift. There are three different types of smokers: wood burning, charcoal, and propane. Smokers can be used to cook both meats and vegetables at the same time which makes them perfect for tailgating.

*Cooler (tailgating)

Another item that is a tailgating must is a cooler. A cooler can be used to keep drinks and other carefully wrapped dishes like potato salad cool.  All your football fan will have to do is fill it up and head out to the game day party.

*Flat screen television

Let your favorite football fan watch that big game on a new flat screen television.  They can be purchased at any electronics store. They range in price according to size, so it’s easy to get one to fit your budget.

*Memorabilia

Anything with your football enthusiast’s team logo will make a great gift. This includes footballs, flip flops, bracelets, coffee mugs, and figurines.

Football enthusiasts all have one thing in common-they all love the game. When choosing a gift for them, get them something they will love.  Choose one of the gifts from the list above.

Planning a Tailgating Party

How to plan a tailgate party

 

If you are ready for some football, chances are you are also ready for a great tailgating party. If are you thinking about hosting a tailgate party, don’t settle for just another ordinary party.  Have the best tailgate party every.  Don’t know how? Then read on.

*Choose location

When hosting a tailgate party, location is everything. Choose a location that is close enough to the game, but far enough away that you and your buddies can truly enjoy yourself.  A lot of college campuses are banning tailgating in their parking lots, so have a different location in mind just in case. If you do have your tailgate party on the campus parking lot, learn their rules for tailgating. Parks, picnic areas, and beaches are great places to host a tailgate party. You will also need to decide if you will have tables at your party or use the tailgate of your vehicle.

*Decide on the size of the party and menu

Figure out how large your tailgate party will be.  If you are inviting a large number of people, then be sure to you pick a place that is large enough to accommodate your crowd and not interfere with other tailgaters.

*Potluck or Organized Meal

This also a good time to decide if you will prepare all of the food or if you will do potluck. Once you have made this decision, you can decide what type of food you will have at your party. Whether you are doing potluck or doing all the cooking, you will want to carefully plan your menu.

*Prepare some dishes ahead of time

To save time and energy, it is best to prepare some food ahead of time. Marinate your meat and make simple dishes like chili, taco filling, sloppy joes and potato or pasta salads before heading out. Consider how you will keep your food safe from contamination.  Have a specified place to keep your meats and one to keep the rest of your food. Good hand washing is also a must.

*Drinks

You should plan to bring enough soft drinks and water to last football fans throughout the party.  When trying to figure out how many drinks you will need, a good way to estimate is to assume each guest will drink one to two cans per hour of the party. If the weather is cool, you can also prepare hot cocoa or hot coffee.

*Eating utensils

Eat is so easy to forget the plates, cups, paper towels, and other eating utensils.  So, put them at the top of your shopping list. 

*Pack the car

Last, you will need to pack the car or truck.  Put your heavy equipment in first like your smoker, grill, cooler, and deep fryer.  Keep your food dishes away from these items to prevent containers from getting broken.

Football and tailgating go hand in hand. Even though tailgating is an informal party, don’t just throw things together.  Follow the suggestions above and have one of the greatest tailgating parties ever.

How Long Should You Wait for Him to Pop the Question?

How Long Should You Wait for Him to Pop the Question?

(This is my own personal opinion and personal experience. Each relationship is different. )

So, the two of you have been dating for a while…and, I do mean a while. He hasn’t asked you marry him yet even though you get along great. You like his family. His family likes you. He may have even told you that he loves you. You have waited anxiously Christmas after Christmas, birthday after birthday, and Valentine’s Day after Valentine’s Day. You may even be the mother of his child. The two of you may even be living together, so what is the hold-up? When will he pop the question?

Okay, ladies, let’s be honest with ourselves. Men are not like us. They don’t react emotionally. They react logically. They think things through and look at the bigger picture. Instead of worrying about love and spending eternity with us, they worry about paying bills and providing a good, stable home. So, just because he likes you, it doesn’t mean he wants to spend the rest of his life with you.

Yes, you may have given him 10 or more good years. You may have devoted your life to helping him succeed. However, if the two of you have been dating for several years, and he hasn’t asked you yet, look out! He is probably still looking for “Mrs. Right”. What?! You thought it was you. Well, he may not think so.

What makes me say this? Simple. If the man wanted to marry you, he would have by now. Don’t fall for the excuse that he is just trying to establish his career or that he is trying to finish sowing his wild oat. Even if he isn’t aware of it, he is not quite satisfied with you.

How would I know? I spent 6 years of my life waiting on my high school sweetheart. Guess, what? As soon as we broke up, he married someone else within a year. I spent another 10 years waiting for the “Man of My Dreams” to wake up and realize that I was “The One”.  “Mister” still hasn’t woke up, but I have. I have watched countless women do the same thing. But, we don’t have to.

Do a reality check on your relationship. And, don’t be fooled. Just because he bought you the ring, it doesn’t guarantee that he will walk you down the aisle.

What can you do? Simple. Have a heart to heart talk with your man. Ask him about the future of your relationship. Is he thinking about settling down? Does he envision the two of you together when you are old?

If you are satisfied with just being his girlfriend, then great. Stop worrying and let the relationship take its course.

Don’t waste another minute on a dead-end relationship. Decide what you want and verbalize this in a non-threatening way to your partner.

What Does He Mean...

You Say “I Love You. He Says “Let’s Be FWB”

So, you did it. You confess your love to this guy that you have had your eyes and mind on for quite some time. You have been praying and hoping that he felt the same way that you did. It took you a while, but you finally worked up the nerve to proclaim your love. Then, what does he do? Instead of saying that he feels the same way or letting you know that he doesn’t, he suggesting being friends with benefits. What is up?

Okay, siesta. I love you so I will tell you the truth. He means that he likes your body. Maybe he is lonely. Either ways, he has evaluated you and decided that he would like to have sex with you. Same thing as I love you, right? Wrong. At least, he likes me, right? Wrong, again. He doesn’t like you as a person. He likes what he thinks your body can do for him. He likes the prospect of getting you home for dessert. No, he is not considering you as girlfriend or wife material. He is considering you a willing victim. A volunteer to his drama. Don’t fall for it. Don’t agree. Don’t stoop to this level thinking things will change once the two of you hook up. It won’t.

Men place women in categories: girlfriend material, wife material, doable, doable when my boys aren’t around, and no way. You are on his “doable” list. Not one of the first two.

So, what should you do? Tell him, “Thanks but no thanks”, go home have a good cry, and begin to move on. If he comes back later, check to see where his mind is at. If he is ready for a commitment, go for it. But, don’t go along with the game. As my brothers, Stanley and Maurice, love to say “There are no victims in this game, only willing volunteers.” Don’t be a lamb led to the slaughter. Realize you are worth more than that.

Things Married, Chrisitans Shouldn't Say to Single People

As a single woman, I can’t tell you the number of times I have had someone tell me that I am single because there are some things I need to work on. I have been told that while I wait on the “right man”~the man God has specially designed for me~I should work on myself because “you attract what you are”. I have been asked, “What can you bring to the table? What can you offer a man?”

What?! This is so offensive to me that I can’t even express it in words. Why? Right, I have two degrees. Plus, I run my own photography business and write professionally. I am not rolling in money, but I do fairly well. It is a fact that most black women make more than black men. I would love to meet a man (black, white, or whatever color) who can meet me halfway. Next and most importantly, “I like me”. I would love to meet a man who likes to have “his own space” sometimes because I need mine. So, please go hunting, shoot some ball, or spend some time with the boys. I would love to find a man who likes to spend time reading or watching the game. I would love to find someone who enjoys some of the same things I do. I like me.

No, I don’t feel that there is a lot I need to work on. Yes, I can spend all of this wonderful time with God. However, God himself said that it was not good for man to be alone.

Question to all those married people: If I need to spend all of this time with God just because I am single, what about yourself? Does getting married signify that you have got it all together and you are excempt for prayer and fasting? When I look at the married couples I know, so many of them seem so miserable. I wonder if they are spending as much time with God as they are suggesting that I do because I am single.

Being single is not a curse. It is not a disease. For some people, it is a lifestyle choice. For some people, it is a temporary state. For me, it is the place where God has me for the moment. I don’t feel that he has me here because I am a wretched person or because I need to get my career established. Why am I single? I am single because this is God’s design for at this time and at this place. This doesn’t mean that I will be single forever. It simply means that God in his wisdom has me in a holding position, and when he is ready for me to land, he will guide me safely home.

Single, Sexual Being, In Love with God

 

I know the title is crazy, but it is true. I am single. I love God, but I am also a sexual being. I am aware that sex is best enjoyed within marriage. I believe the Bible. However, I will not lie and say that I don’t have sexual desire. This would be hypocrisy. I do want a companion. I want to get married. I want to enjoy sex.

No, I am not advocating premarital sex. But, I am being truthful. I have learned that God knows me. He know my thoughts and my feelings. And, I do have sexual feelings. I believe virginity is valuable, and if I could go back I would. But, that is water under the bridge. What does irritate me is when Christians who are married tell me to save yourself and I know they didn’t. What irritates me are Christian men who tell me not to give men my phone number or tell a man that I am attracted to him. Okay. Maybe. But, I am an independent woman, and I don’t see anything wrong with smiling back at a man I am attracted to.

I try to remain faithful to the cause. But, I am human. I am a sexual being, and I do still have the desire to be with a man sexually. Is this wrong when I love God?

The only person who can answer that is God. So, save all your negative responses. I just decided to be honest~unlike so many Christians out there who are having sex and aren’t married.

7 Simple Ways to Go Frugal

 

Learning how to live frugal is vital in today’s tough economy. Although most people assume living frugal means doing without and suffering, it doesn’t. What it means is smart spending and saving. The following are 7 simple things that you can do to save money and live more frugally.

Cut Coupons

Although it has been said time and again, it is a fact that using coupons will help you save money. You should use coupons to purchase staple items in bulk. Whenever an item that you use regularly is on sale and you have coupons for it, you should buy that item in large quantities. This will ensures that you don’t have to purchase the item again until it goes back on sale.

Sew socks

Who sews socks? When they get a hole in them, the first thing we do is throw them out and buy more, right? No! You don’t throw them out. By throwing out those socks, you are throwing away money. Most hole form at the tip of the sock. So, instead of tossing them in the trash, grab a needle and thread and go to work sewing up that hole. Because the hole is at the tip of the sock, no one will see your needle work anyway.

Pick up pennies

Picking up pennies is also a great way to save a little extra money. Lost pennies are everywhere. Take the time to pick them up. Add them to your piggy bank. After a few months take them out, bag them, and head to the bank. You will be surprise at the amount of money you will have over time. Remember the guy who paid off his house in pennies? Think about it.

Drink more water

Put the carbonated soda down and drink more water. Water is good for the body. It helps keep you hydrated, help to ensure that the brain receives the need amount of oxygen, and keeps the digestive system moving. Water has zero calories, and in most restaurants, it is free. So, instead of ordering a soda that you will be overcharged for, have a glass of water instead.

Buy soda in bulk

If you can’t seem to escape the need for carbonated soda, buy those drinks in bulk. Buying drinks by the case is much cheaper than buy them in single 12 oz. cans. Also, keep a few in your car for those times when you use the drive through. By having some can sodas already in your car, you don’t have to order a drink at the drive through. This will also help to save you money.

Shop consignment

Consignment shops are great places to find quality clothes without paying full price. These gently used clothes are often just as good as those bought from a department store, and they are half the department store price.

Eat out less

Eating out can be expensive. Although some people will beg to differ, it is much cheaper to eat meals at home. Why? The amount of money that you spend on one meal could have been used to prepare a larger meal that you can eat more than once in a day and that can be used for leftovers.

Living frugal doesn’t have to be hard. The things listed above are simple, painless things that you can do to help save money.

Progressive Commerical

Okay, I know this is totally silly, but I was just watching the Progressive commercial about bundling. It's the one with the car driving up the driveway with the side lights all coming on and slow music playing in the background. The car states, "I been thinking about you and I just couldn't fight it".  Then, it flips back to Flo telling this little boy, "And, that's how a home and auto bundle is made."
LOL!!! I love it.

5 Simple Ways to Make Time for Your Mate

 

With all the pressures of everyday living, finding time to spend with your significant other can be difficult. However, it is not impossible. Don’t let a busy schedule destroy your relationship. The following five tips can help you make time for your mate.

*Share Chores

Make use of every opportunity. When you get home from work, don’t just head straight for the couch or for that pile of dishes sitting in the sink. Turn chores into together time. Fix dinner together. Wash dishes together. Be sure to touch each other often while working together. And, don’t forget that bath time can exciting too. So, take a quick shower together.

*Make Lunch Special

Lunch break doesn’t have to be a boring affair. It can become an exotic delight if the two of you work close to home or close enough to spend it together. Schedule a lunch date. Spend that time talking or skip lunch, head home, and enjoy each other.

*Become Early Birds or Night Owls

If you relationship is important to you, then be willing to make a few sacrifices. Set your alarm a few minutes earlier or reschedule bedtime. Spend an extra fifteen to thirty minutes with your partner simply talking or touching. 

*Don’t forget to Communicate

So, you are always busy or the two of you keep missing each other. It is amazing just how important communicate is. Pick up the phone and give your mate a call. And, do call just to discuss the children or complain about work. Liven up that phone conversation by telling him or her how much you want them. Tell them what you find attractive about them.  If you don’t feel comfortable talking sexy on the phone, simply let your mate know that you love them and that you are thinking about them.

* Schedule Time Together

Be sure to pencil your partner in on your busy schedule. They are just as important as that next business meeting. Set aside time each day to spend with them. It can be a regular “date night” or something as simple as a special dinner. Surprising them with your romantic gestures is great, but if they have a busy schedule like you do, you might want to let them know what your plans are so that they don’t plan something else during this time.

Don’t let a busy lifestyle ruin your relationship. Make your mate a priority. Find simple ways to stay connected with them.

Dating Ideas for Fall

The hot and humid days of summer have given way to the cooler days of autumn.  As the earth changes her colors, now is a great time to plan a date that allows you to appreciate nature’s beauty and great weather. The following are dating ideas for the fall season.

Pumpkin patch

As the fall holidays approach, picking and decorating pumpkins together can be fun. So, plan a visit to your local pumpkin patch.  Pick out some pumpkins together. Head home with your pumpkins and carve them for the holiday. And, don’t throw those seeds away. You can roast them for a great snack.

Hayride

Fall is a great time of year to go for a hayride. You can opt to decorate your own wagon or tractor and have a friend chauffeur the two of you or you can schedule a hayride with a group.

Bonfire on the beach

Sitting around a large bonfire on the beach at night can be romantic. Gather some kindling, long logs, and a pack of matches. And, don’t forget the blankets and hot cocoa.

Park

The park is still a nice date location even in the fall. You can have a picnic, feed the ducks together, enjoy a concert, or some of the other great fall events.

Nature walks

Nature walks are great dating ideas for the fall season. You can go for a nature walk in the park or at one of the national parks in your area. You can even observe the local wildlife while on your walk together. Be sure to plan ahead and pack everything that you might need for your nature walk like a map, bottled water, wipes, a camera, and a communication devise. 

Football games

As cooler weather sets in, so does football season. If your date loves sports, then a football game is a perfect place for a fall date. You get to cheer for your favorite team while enjoying time together. If the weather is crisp, be sure to pack a blanket for snuggling up.

Go apple picking

Take your date apple picking. Plan a tour of a local orchard. You and your date can even help to make some apple cider or apple butter.

Halloween date

 Halloween is just around the corner. So, why not plan a Halloween date your partner will never forget. Take your loved one on a tour of a haunted house.

Autumn provides a beautiful canvas for couples. Plan a date that allows you and your partner to enjoy each other and the weather.

Reflections of Teachers Past

 

Reflections: Teachers

Some of our earliest experiences in life are with teachers. They guide us from elementary school all the way through high school and on through college. Whether our experiences with them were good or bad, they impacted our lives and influenced our attitudes about learning.

My first teacher was my mother.  She taught me how to be self-sufficient. Because I grew up in the country, I was fortunate enough to learn how to live off of the land. My mother stressed the importance of being able to grow your own food- something all good southerners know how to do. She also taught me how to make quilts.

My mother also instilled in me a love of reading.  Whenever it stormed and the lights went out, she would pull out this big book of fairytales, light as many candles as she could, gather us all up, and start reading.  I loved to listen to the stories of ‘Blue bead’, ‘Beauty and the Beast’, ‘The Little Match Girl’, and the ‘Thumbelina’. Even though we were scared of the lightening, we were always happy when it stormed because we knew our mother would read to us.

My elementary school teachers made lasting impressions on me.  As a matter of fact, one of the things that happened to me in elementary school influenced me to push myself to always be the best.

I will have to admit that my elementary school teachers did have a hard time.  I was hyperactive and sitting still in a desk just wasn’t something I could seem to accomplish for any long period of time. I rarely made it to recess because I won’t be quiet, and I simply couldn’t sit in those desks.  By the time I made it to the third grade, my reputation preceded me, and my teachers knew what to expect. They stopped trying to get me to sit in desks all day and begin to understand that a lot of my behavior was the result of boredom. 

Unfortunately, I did have one bad experience.  One day my regular teacher was out sick, and we had a substitute.  The poor lady was stuck with me for 8 whole hours.  After she had had to yell at me for the umpteenth time for not wanting to sit in my desk, she called me to her.  She then told me, “You, little girl, will never amount to anything.  You will never graduate from high school!” Needless to say, I was devastated.  I carried this lady’s words with me for the rest of  my life.

I thought of her every time I was on Honor Roll.  I thought of her whenever I made an A.  I thought of her when I graduated with Honors from high school and college.  I thought of her every time I won a writing contest. And, I think of her every time I stand in front of my own class.  I make it my business to never discourage a child or destroy their dreams.

When I reached high school, I had a wonderful English teacher by the name of Ms. Jones.  She was a tiny, very dignified lady.  She was very proper and very strict.  Because she taught several different English and literature classes, I ended up having her each year for 3 years. She made us write until our fingers hurt, and we got to read a lot.  Most of my friends hated her, but I loved her.  She always encouraged me to do my best, and she inspired me to become an English teacher. 

I did have the privilege of working with my favorite English teacher just before she retired.  I was also fortunate enough to tell her how much she meant to me before she died. 

When I became a teacher, I tried to model my class after Ms. Jones.  I am not quite as strict, but I try to push my students to do their best.  I also make it my business to expose my students to a wide variety of literature-whether they like it or not.  I also make writing a priority because I know it is a skill that they will need the rest of their lives.

Teachers touch lives. They have been blessed to be able to mold the lives of countless children. 

Benefits of Keeping a Diary

 

Keeping a diary is not just for the young.  It is a great for adults as well. Writing in a diary has many positive health benefits.  Not only does it provide a way of recording the events of one’s daily life, it can help to relieve many physical discomforts.

Ø  Relieves stress

Keeping a diary can help to relieve stress.  When a person is under stress, the stress hormone called cortisol is released into the blood system.  This hormone put the body in a “fight-or-fight” mode, and it stops all functions that are not need immediately. Cortisol is designed to help the body during dangerous and occasionally tense situations. Small amounts of cortisol are good, but on a daily basis cortisol can wreck havoc on the body.

By writing in a diary, a person is able to put all those negative feelings down on paper. It offers an outlet for feelings of stress and frustration which will help to decrease the amount of cortisol in the blood.

Ø  Helps for depression

Writing in a diary can help with depression.  When a person is depressed, they feel hopeless, helpless, and tired.  Financial strains, traumatic events, and stress are some common causes of depression. By writing about one’s feeling and frustrations, a person can self-reflect, identify a cause, and begin to deal with those feelings. A person can write in a diary without having to worry about judged or condemned.

Ø  Improves brain functions

Writing is a mentally stimulating activity and, as such, it is a great way to keep the brain functioning at its best. It can also help improve a person’s memory. By participating in stimulating brain activities, a person can help slow the development of dementia.

Ø  Decreased digestive problems

Diary writing can help improve a person’s digestion.  Because cortisol, the stress hormone, stops or slows any function that is not need immediately during the “fight or flight” mode, a person’s digestion is affected. A person who is dealing with stress on a regular basis is prone to heart burn, indigestion, and constipation.  By decreasing the amount of cortisol in the body, a person can improve their digestion.  Diary writing offers a way to minimize cortisol and improve digestion.

Ø  Decrease symptoms of arthritis

Keeping a diary or journal has also been shown to help with symptoms of arthritis.  Writing about the challenges of the disease allows an outlet for stress and helps the person cope with the difficulties associated with the disease.

Ø  Improved immune functions

Keeping a diary can also help to improve immune functions. Writing in a diary has been proven to decrease stress which has been shown to suppress the immune system. By writing in a diary, a person can decrease stress and decrease the negative effects of cortisol on the immune system.

Writing in a diary has many positive benefits. It has been shown to help decrease the amount of cortisol in a person’s blood stream, decrease digestive problems, improve brain function, less the symptoms of rheumatoid arthritis, and help with depression.

http://voices.yahoo.com/the-five-benefits-keeping-diary.html

http://arthritis.about.com/od/journal/a/journalwriting.html

 

Movies about People with Disabilities

Are you looking for a great movie about persons with a disability?  If you are there are some great movies out there.  There are some that are humorous, and some that are serious. The following is a list of five of the best.

#1: “Simeon Birch” (1998)

Character’s disability: Simeon Birch has dwarfism

Moral of the story: This is the story of twelve year old Joe Wenteworth and his friend, Simeon Birch, the small child in town. Simeon Birch suffers from dwarfism. His condition makes him small and his heart weak. Both Simeon and Joe are town outcasts, and this makes their friendship even stronger. In the summer of 1964, the two boys join forces to try and discover who Joe’s father is (his mother refuses to tell anyone). Over the course of the movie, Joe’s father is revealed as is Simeon’s God-given purpose for being small.

#2: “Forrest Gump” (1994)

Character’s disability: Forrest Gump is mentally challenged.

Moral of the story: Forrest has was born intellectually challenged and with a crooked spine. His mother wants him to be normal, but he never is. She give Forrest the phrase “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are gonna get.”  With this philosophy in mind, he sets off to live life and pursue the love of his life, Jenny. Forrest wandering places him at several

historical events. Although he overcomes his spinal problem, he never overcomes his disability. 

#3: “The Miracle Worker” (1962, 2000)

Character’s disability: Helen Keller is both blind and deaf

Moral of the story: This movie is based on Helen Keller’s autobiography “The Story of My Life”. The story is about her and her teacher, Ann Sullivan who helps her become aware of the world around her. Helen has been spoiled and allowed to do whatever she wants because of her condition.  It takes the strong willed Ann to introduce both discipline and learning into her dark world.

#4: “The Book of Eli” (2010)

Character’s disability: Eli is blind

Moral of the story: This movie is set in a post- apocalyptic society. Eli makes his way westward with a sacred book that he believes will restore mankind. His journey takes him thirty

years to complete, but he survives using his unique fighting skills. Carnegie, a new world mob boss, tries to take Eli’s sacred book, but he is unsuccessful. It is amazing that it is only toward the end of the story that the viewer discovers that Eli is blind and the book he has been protecting is in Braille.

#5: “Powder” (1995)

Character’s Disability: Powder is gifted

Moral of the Story: Powder (Jeremy Reed) is a boy who has extraordinary intellect and paranormal powers. He is also an albino. His mother was struck by lightning while pregnant with him and dies shortly after he is born. His grandparents keep him in the basement because of his

unusual abilities. Unfortunately, he can’t live on his grandparent’s farm forever. Once his grandfather dies, he is removed from the farm and taken to a boy’s home and forced to go to

school.  Powder is exceptionally smart thus his classmates view him as a freak.  He eventually returns to the farm. While there a thunderstorm comes and he is struck by lightning and disappears.

 

The movies listed above are only a few that explore the world of people with disabilities.  There are great movies, and some can be used to demonstrate the importance of acceptance.          

Ways to Be a Smart Shopper

 

What makes a person a smart shopper?  Smart shoppers are people who know how to stretch a dollar and how to find the best deal.  They use coupons, discounts, and store deals in order to save money.  They are not swayed by fashion or economic trends.  So, how do you become a smart shopper?  Simple.  Use the following strategies and watch your savings add up.

• Have a budget and stick to it

One of the main things that a smart shopper knows is to construct a shopping budget and then stick to it.  A budget will let you know how much money you can afford to spend during your shopping trip. Having a budget will also help prevent any impulse spending.  By being able to look at actual figures, you will be able to stay more focused on your goal of saving money while getting the things that you really need.

• Plan a menu

A smart shopper also knows that menu planning can help them save money and prevent food from spoiling.  Check your pantry and refrigerator. Then, plan your menu around the foods you already have.

• Have a list

How many times have you headed off to the store with a product in mind that you needed to buy only to realize that you forgot what it was once you got there? Before heading out to the stores, a smart shopper will have a detailed shopping list and know where it is at all times during their shopping trip. They will also use that shopping list religiously.

• Check sales papers

An important rule of money saving is to check sales papers.  Never, never go shopping without checking the sales papers first.  There is nothing more heartbreaking than to purchase an item at one store only to find out after you get home that the item is on sale at a store only a few blocks away.  Be sure that you have a plan when you go into the store. 

• Shop according to the seasons

Shopping according to the seasons will save you tons of money.  The first of fall is the time to purchase all of your summer clothes, patio furniture, and barbeque grills. The first of spring is the time to stock up on coats, sweaters, and other winter gear.  Stores drop the prices on these out of season items in order to make room for the new season’s stock.

Food items also follow a seasonal trend. January is diet month and all cereals and other healthy living items go on sale. Vegetables like broccoli and cabbage are also at their lowest prices. The end of June and the first of July are the best times to stock up on items like barbeque sauce, ketchup, mustard, hot dogs, and other Fourth of July items.  Strawberries, tomatoes, and watermelons are at their lowest price. Learn which foods are in season and center your meals around them because they are at their cheapest.

• Buy nonperishable items in bulk

Buy nonperishable items like toothpaste, dish detergent, bathroom tissue, and paper towel in bulk when they go on sale. Evaluate your storage space and try to purchase as much as your budget will allow.  Try to get enough to last for several months. This way, you will not have to purchase the item again until it goes back on sell.

A smart shopper also knows that he or she can purchase large quantities of milk, cheese, and bread.  Each of these items can be frozen.  When purchasing large quantities of milk, remember to remove about a cup and a half from the container.  Slim and low fat milk freeze best.  It is also advised that frozen milk be used for cooking and not for drinking because the components may separate when the milk is frozen.

• Eat before you shop

A smart shopper knows not to go shopping while hungry.  When you are hungry, you are more prone to give in to impulse buying.  Your hunger will drive you to purchase food items that you don’t need.  A smart shopper knows to eat or grab a simple snack before hitting the stores.

• Use discounts

Strategic shoppers will grab any discount that they can.  There are tons of discounts available like senior citizen discounts, frequent shopper discounts, military discounts, and student discounts. Always take advantage of these shopping discounts.

• Use loyalty cards

Store loyalty cards are a must for the smart shopper. The savings may not be much in the beginning, but they do add up. You can receive discounts on prescriptions, groceries, and gas. The money you save by using loyalty cards can be used for other purchases. 

• Shop alone

Make it a point to shop alone.  Shopping with children or friends can interfere with your money saving strategies. Children can cause you to make unnecessary purchase, and friends can be a distraction unless your friends have the save money-saving goals that you do.

• Shop later in the day or very early in the morning

Smart shoppers know that things are cheaper at certain times of the day. The best times to shop are early in the morning or at night.  The meat department will mark down meat that is nearing its expiration date late in the evening.  A smart shopper will grab these mark downs and head for the freezer. They also know to cook the meat as soon as possible.  The bakery will also mark down baked goods that did not sell that day.

• Use coupons

For a smart shopper, coupon use is not just a fad, but a way of life.  Coupons can be used to purchase groceries or other items at a lower price, and if used strategically, they can even make some products free. 

Coupons can be found in the newspaper and on social networks.  Some companies offer coupons and promotions on their products, and all you have to do is visit the companies' websites, sign up, and check for valuable coupons. There are also coupon clipping services.  These services will locate and clip coupons for you. Many new products often have high value coupons on them called peelies or right next to the product.

Smart shoppers know how to find a deal.  They study store sale circulars, use coupons, and shop seasonally.