When Black Women Go White: The Response to Black Women Dating Interracially

The April edition of Ebony featured an article entitled “Scandalized by ‘Scandal’”. It discussed the backlash that the show was receiving from black men. It seems that some black men find it offensive that the show’s star, Olivia Pope, is dating a powerful white man-the president of the United States-Fitzgerald Grant. Pope has also been featured with Jack Ballard, another powerful white man. My question is: What seems to be the problem?

For years, our black men have dated and married white women. However, black women have not so readily embraced interracial dating. It is only in recent years that the black woman has begun to embrace her choices. For so long, we were loyal to our African-American brothers even though they felt no such ties to us. Only a few years ago, it seemed like almost every black man who played professional sports or who brought home a substantial income was sporting women who were not of color on his arms.

So, why did black stay faithful to black men so long? First, some black women were worried about what their friends and family will say. They worried about how their friends would react if they dated outside the black community. Second, as African-American women, we had been feed a bunch of bull about how white men were not as well-endowed as black men or that they were not as good in bed. Then, there was the cultural difference.

We have been taught that men of other races don’t find us attractive. We have been told that  we were too dark, that our butts were too large, and that our hair is not long enough or soft enough. And, let’s be honest. As black women, we obsess over our hair. As a result, we wondered how white men would react to their course tress as compared with white women.

Now that the walls are starting to come down, some black men are lashing out. But, why? There are so many single, black women out there that it only makes sense for black women to stop limiting themselves. The facts can’t be denied. There is a lack of available black men. Where are they? They are incarcerated, gay, or married to women who are not African-American.

I am not mad at Shonda Rhimes for creating a beautiful, powerful, intelligent black woman who happens to be involved with a Caucasian male. In fact, I applaud her for creating Olivia. I applaud her for letting the world know that a powerful, white man can actually love a black woman. So, to all those black men who are angry, I would just like to say-“Get over it.”

http://voices.yahoo.com/reason-more-black-women-dont-date-interracially-11929342.html
http://voices.yahoo.com/more-black-women-date-interracially-11643770.html

Five of My Favorite Articles about Spring on Yahoo Voices

5 Great Spring Articles on Yahoo Voices

As spring moves in, my mind moves toward the great outdoors and toward ways to quickly and effectively liven up my home. The following are five of my favorite articles about spring on Yahoo Voices.

Number 1: Spring Decorating Ideas Bring New Life to Your Kitchen by Jennifer Drake.

I love this spring article. It discusses the many ways to bring your kitchen to life as the weather warms up. This article recommends letting the sunshine in and changing out the dark colors in the kitchen. The article suggests using more delicate, airy alternatives to the heavy, dark curtains and coverings. Two even simpler suggestions were to place spring flowers in the kitchen or to use a plain bowl of fruit as a centerpiece on top of spring themed linens.

Number 2:  5 Ways to Bring Spring into Your Kitchen by Sally Albright

My second favorite spring article is by Sally Albright. This is another article that discusses ways to bring springtime into your kitchen. Of course, flowers are a great way to give your kitchen a pop of spring. Some spring flowers that are suggested in the article are tulips, daffodils, and roses. These can be placed in vases and strategically placed in your kitchen.

Live flowers are great, but they are not the only way to bring spring into the kitchen. Dried flowers are another ways to add life to the kitchen. Albright suggests tying dried flowers together and hanging them upside down in kitchen windows.

Citrus fruits such as lemons, limes, and oranges can also be placed in clear vases and displayed on counters or the kitchen table. Not only are these pretty, but they are also edible.

Number 3: 5 Ways to Bring Spring into Your Living Room by Sally Albright

My next favorite Yahoo spring article is also by Sally Albright. It discusses easy ways to change the face of your living room to fit the warm weather. Instead of sticking with those dark colors, she recommends lightening up your couch or sofa with decorative slipcovers. 

Another way she suggests to bring spring into your living room is by using removable wall border in spring print. She also recommends decorating the living room walls with spring themed wreathes. I especially love these ideas because they give me the ability to change the look of my living room without having to repaint my walls.

Number 4: How to Incorporate Silver into Your Spring Wardrobe by Lawanda Shields

I am a fashionsista. I love to read about fashion and style. This is one of my own articles, but I love it because I got to write about something I love-fashion. In this article, I discussed ways that silver can be worn even in warm weather. So, don’t feel confined to pastels for spring. Metallics can also be successful worn in spring, and this article discusses how.

Number 5: 5 Must Have Spring Fashion Trends for 2014 by Melissa Matters

This article is a newbie, but one that I like. Pastels are synonymous with spring, but that doesn’t you can’t wear classic foundation colors. This article discusses ways to incorporate black and white into a spring wardrobe. It discusses how to successfully wear metallics during the spring. It also discusses another hot spring trend for this year. That trend is the wide leg trouser. I love wide leg trousers, and they can be worn in every season.

Spring is one of my favorite times of the year. I love the longer days and warmer weather. The articles listed above are some of my favorites, and they help me to transition from winter to spring.

How Southern Women Really Dress: Not All Southern Women Wear Plaid

Southern Style

Project Runway is one of my favorite shows. I love watching the different designers compete against one another, and most of all, I love to see the beautiful fashions that they design for the runway. One of the season 12 episodes, they hosted a competition where they had to design a look for the modern southern woman. Ken Laurence, one of the competitors who was from Alabama, tried to tell the other competitors and the world that Southern women don’t just wear plaid. He stated that this was a stereotype. They did not listen. He did not win the competition. Other designers who cast us Southern gals in plaid won. Ken Laurence eventually lost and life moved on. End of story. Not so!

Ken Laurence was right. We don’t live in plaid. We are not the country hicks that people think we are. Yes, we enjoy beautiful fashions. No, we don’t wear a lot of couture outfits. It is true. We are somewhat conservative as a whole. But, we do like to wear modern styles and flaunt our stuff. So, for those of you who really want to know what southern style is, here it goes.

 

We like to wear our white dresses and skirts in the summer. We love bold colors just like everyone else. And, we do appreciate designer clothes and accessories.

I confess. I love classy designers like Isaac Mizrahi and Joan Rivers. I am a sucker for Dooney and Bourke purses. I confess. I do shop Avon and consignment shops. I don’t wear the big straw hats during the summer, but I do love to throw on a big, hat for Sundays. I love leather. This includes leather jackets, leather pants, and skirts. And, trust me. I melt when I can find it on sale.

My mother is definitely a fashionsista. You can’t beat her dressing. It doesn’t matter whether she is dressing for church, going to a quick brunch, or heading off to work in a pair of scrubs.

Okay, so I have thrown on a plaid shirt, a pair of blue jeans, and some cowboy boots. But, this is not an everyday occurrence. So, for those of you who do fashion or who make reality shows about fashion, don’t think just because we live in the South that we only like plaid. We don’t. We love a wide variety of styles and colors. No, we may not dress like Olivia Pope from ABC’s Scandal or walk like Naomi Campbell. Take a look at Kim from Kim of Queens. She is from Georgia, and she dresses like a modern southern woman.

How to Talk to an Attractive Woman

How to Approach the Woman of Your Dreams

You see her from across the room. You heart beats faster, and you are weak in the knees. This woman is gorgeous. So, what do you do? How do you make an introduction and start a conversation with this attractive woman?  Simple. Use the following steps and make a lasting impression on the girl of your dreams.

Confident

First, you will need to bring your “A” game.  Don’t head over to her and begin stuttering and staring. Instead, build up your confidence and then make a strong lasting impression. Think of the infamous James Bond. He is calm, cool, and collective. You should be the same when you approach your dream girl.

Watch the eyes

Next, watch her eyes. It has been said that the eyes are the windows to the soul. And, in most cases, this is true. Before you approach this goddess of beauty, be sure to make eye contact with her. Her eyes will tell you what she is thinking. They can signal if she is annoyed, irritated, or just plain bored. They can also give you a good clue as to your chances. However, unless she looks downright disgusted with you, you may still give it a shot. Because most of people are visual creatures, she may judge you by your looks first. But, don’t despair if you don’t look like a Greek god. If you can be original, sincere, and confident, you may be able to win her over with your other attributes.

Be original

You know she’s beautiful, and chances are good that she does too. So, don’t waste your time telling her how good she looks. She has heard it before. I am not saying don’t ever compliment her, but what I am saying is don’t just walk up to her and say, “You know, you are a very attractive woman.” Trust me, this will get you nowhere. And, please, please don’t use one of those cheesy lines. This will make you look silly and destroy your chances with your dream girl. Instead, come up with an opener that is both original and interesting. If at all possible, find out what her interests are and use one of these topic as a way of starting a conversation.

Be sincere

Don’t use fake lines and fake compliments. Be sincere. Come up with an original introduction, and make sure that it is a sincere one. Don’t compliment her on her singing voice when you know she sounds awful. She will know that you are lying. It will also make her think that this is a pattern.

Be brief

Finally, be brief. Know when to walk away. Don’t let the conversation drag on. Remember, you want to give her something to think about. Leave her wanting more and not less of you. So, excuse yourself. If she is still interested, she will ask for your number or another way to contact you.

Talking to a beautiful woman can be intimidating. However, it can successfully be done using the tips above.