How to Make Your Relationship Work When Your Family Hates Your Partner

 

Surviving Your Family

You love your family and friends, and you know they only want what is best for you. So, when they hate your partner it can leave you feeling hurt and disillusioned.  No matter how much you try you just can’t seem to understand where this hatred came from.  Although it may be difficult, a relationship can survive even though your family hates your partner. Here’s how.

*Identify the problem

If at all possible, try to discover the cause of the animosity. Your family loves you, and there is a reason that they dislike your partner.  Try to help your family and your mate work through all of their differences. However, don’t get upset if the conflict is not resolved immediately.

*Give it time

You will not be able to change your family’s mind over night. It will take time for your family to get to know your companion like you do.  Time may soften your family’s heart and correct whatever issues that may have caused the rift to begin with.

*Point out the good

You should make every effort to remind your friends and family of your partner’s good points.  You have been privileged to see a side of your mate that your family hasn’t.  Point out the special things about your companion. Try to create opportunities for your family and friends to bond with your partner. 

*Set boundaries

Disgruntle family members can cause a lot of problems in your relationship if boundaries are not set. Set boundaries and define limits from the beginning.   Let your family and friends know what is acceptable and what is not. They are your family, but that does not give them an all access pass into your personal affairs.

*Demand respect

Do not allow your family to disrespect your partner.  Demand respect for yourself and your relationship. Do not allow them to berate your partner in front of you, and don’t allow them to disrespect your partner in his or her presence. Define the type of behavior that counts as disrespect. Let your family know you value their opinion; however, you are able to make decisions for yourself.

*Split your time

Split your time between your family and your partner.  Don’t feel pressured to give one more time than the other.  Let your partner and your family know that you love them, but you will not be forced to choose between them.

You love your family, and they love you. You want to please them, so it can be hard to make a relationship work when they hate your partner. However, you are the deciding factor in your own relationship. 
http://www.livestrong.com/article/218474-how-to-cope-with-family-conflict/
http://www.positive-way.comsetting_boundaries.htm
 

How to Recover Your Friendship after Being "Friends with Benefits" Fails

 

So, you and your BFF (Best Friend Forever) decide to cross the line and become “Friends with Benefits”. Although things were great at first, the arrangement didn’t work out. One or both of you begin to have romantic feelings for the other one. And, as a result, things ended badly. So, now what do you do? How you recover from losing your lover and your best friend?

Give It Time

First, start by giving it some time. You have just suffered a major loss. You were betrayed by someone that you love. So, it is normal to grieve that loss. Think about it. This was someone that you trusted with your most intimate feelings and secrets. The two of you shared your dreams and your fears. The two of you also decided to share your bodies. Now, you have been left with a giant hole in your heart. Only time can heal these wounds.

Find an Outlet

Next, find a way to release those hurt feelings. You can take up journaling or writing in a dairy. Writing about your feelings will help you to heal over time. You can also start exercising. This will help to increase dopamine and serotonin (feel good hormones) in your blood. You can also explore new hobbies. These things will help to keep your mind off of your lost friendship. And, please, please, don’t jump into bed with another friend or lover just to stop the pain. This never works and can cause more trouble than it is worth.

Admit Your Mistakes

The next step to recovering your lost friendship is to admit your mistakes. Whether the rift was caused by you or your friend, you should evaluate what happened. Ask yourself what went wrong with your arrangement. If you can’t seem to figure out what happened, you may want to consult another friend for answers.

Rebuild Trust

Trust is built over time. So, it will take time to rebuild the trust that the two of you lost when your “Friends with Benefits” relationship failed. You can start by talking to each other about what happened, listening to the other person’s perspective of things, and offering any needed apologies. You may not be ready to resume your close friendship right now. So, be honest with your friend about this. Start small. Remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day.

Put the Past Behind

You and your friends must agree to put the past behind you. At this point, you should have discussed all of the important issues. Let go of the past. Forgive each other and agree to move past your failed sexual relationship and back into your platonic friendship.

It is always risky trying to be “Friends with Benefits”. There are so many things that can go wrong, and too often those things do go wrong. Thankfully, you don’t have to lose your best friend forever. The suggestions listed above will help you move past the pain.

http://voices.yahoo.com/how-successfully-handle-break-up-11957066.html

http://www.livinghealthy360.com/index.php/ways-to-relax-without-turning-to-food-3194/

http://voices.yahoo.com/rebuilding-trust-relationship-5822624.html

http://exercise.about.com/cs/exercisehealth/a/depressin.htm