Couponing Diva Victory

Summer is here, and now, I can get back to one of my favorite things: couponing. I love couponing. It saves me money, and I get to purchase the products I need for a low price.

Well, I went on a couponing mission on Saturday at our local Dollar General store. I used my $5.00 off of $25.00. I also uploaded the store coupons on the website. And, I used coupons from my local newspaper.  I spent $57.00 on items that should have cost me about $80.00. I had a savings of 22%. This was awesome, but in all honesty, I wanted to have a savings of about 50%. Well, I didn’t make it on this particular trip, but when I looked at my saving for the last 30 days (on the store website), I had an overall savings of 88%. Can you say, “Awesome!”?

To add icing to the cake, on my store receipt, I got another opportunity to save more money. They offered a coupon for $3.00 off of $15.00 for completing a survey about the store. I did the survey and got the coupon.

When I did couponing more regularly, I always put about $20.00 back and purchased one particular item. My goal for the month of July is to store up on my favorite toothpaste. So, I will be actively looking for toothpaste coupons. I had 5 years’ worth of toothpaste. I am just now running out, and I want to store back up. I also have plans to load up on laundry detergent and shower gel.

The Fantasy

The Fairytale

I think as women, we all have some secret fantasy or fairytale in our minds. We were read these wonderful stories of love conquering all when we were growing up, and we want so badly for those tales to be true. We want that fairytale ourselves. We want to believe in the magical kingdom and the knight in shining armor. Sadly, it isn’t true.

I can remember my own fairytale. I always believe that I would grow up to become a famous write one day. I would do teaching just for fun. I would live in a moderate sized house with 3 bathrooms, 4 bedrooms, 3 kids and a husband who absolutely adored me.

Well, now I’m grown. Now, I don’t live in my dream house with the 3 bathroom, 4 bedrooms, and the little nook where I write my books. I don’t have 3 kids. I did have 2 kids. And, suddenly, I have a rumbustious little kitty cat.

I am a write. I have had the privilege of writing online for Yahoo and Helium. I do have some book on Amazon. I also have the privilege to start my own online store on Teacher Pays Teachers. I have gotten to write for my local newspaper from time to time.

I did not get to walk down the aisle in a beautiful white dress with the man of my dreams. I have not met the man of my dreams. I have learned that there is no knight in shining armor. There are only choices we make.

As an African American woman, my chances of getting married are slimmer than women of other races. I know I’m going to get in trouble for saying these, but I sometimes wonder if I am wasting my time with African American men. I constantly ask myself why can’t they just “man up”.

Anyway, I would love to just live in the fantasy. I would love to live in the beautiful house with wonderful husband and the great kids. I would be so great to come home from a wonderful day at work to the welcoming arms of a man who loves me…and who I love. I must add that I must love him too. 

Ah…yes. Now, I get to make a quick and fabulous dinner for the family. We get to all sit down and eat together as a family.

Oh, the kids…one son is grown and on his own. However, he is not living up to the dream I had for him. I wanted him to grow-up and go off to college. I wanted him to get a great job and be financially stable. Well, since he just graduated from high school only 2 years ago, there is still hope that he will go to college instead of going to work full-time. My youngest son is still in school and doing fine.

Well, it was great to live in the fantasy. Now, it’s time to head back to the reality. Who knows? Maybe, one day the fantasy will come true.

My Favorite Summer Beauty Products

Summer Beauty

 

 

Summer is here, and so is the time to take care of your body. For this post, I decided to talk about some of my favorite beauty products this summer. First, my skin. I love to take showers. There is just something about the feel of warm water and tons and tons of suds. Here are my favorite shower gels:

 

 

I absolutely love Dove body wash. It feels so creamy and smooth. When I want to think of what to write in my books, I grab the Dove and jump in the shower. It really gets my creative juices flowing. I also love the feel of the Nivea. It is also smooth. I also love the fragrance of the Nivea. One time my guy friend thought it was perfume. And, last but not least, is the Suave. I love it. It is inexpensive and smells awesome. I love all the different fragrances.

 

Hair...hair...hair! It is no secret that I wear hair extension and accents. To keep my natural hair blended and looking smooth, I use gel. My favorite gel is: Shine n' Jam. This stuff works great.

 

Of course, you have to wash clothes in the summer. So, I decided to talk about my favorite laundry detergents. Here are my top picks:

 

 

Here are 3 of my favorite detergents. I love Cheer, Tide, Purex, and Gain. I am out of Gain at the moment. I will admit my favorite one is Cheer. I love the smell. I love the way it does my clothes. I just love it. I also love Purex. Purex is the cheapest, but it smells great and cleans just as well.

 

 

Well, these are my summer picks for the moment. Back with more later!

 





Winter Storm Outage Tips You May Not Have Thought Of

Winter Weather Outages Preparation Tips You Might Not Have Thought Of

Winter is finally here, and along with winter comes the possibility of power outages. Sure, you know to insulate the windows and purchase batteries. But did you think of these other important things?

*Have extra blankets and thick clothing available

Have extra blankets and clothes available to use during a winter power outage.  When the power goes out, your home could easily lose its heating source, and you will need the blankets and clothes to keep warm. You and your family should dress in as many layers as possible to keep warm. Keep your head covered since a large percentage of one’s body heat is lost through the head.

It is also a good idea to keep blankets in your car. If you have too, you can use your car for brief periods to access its heater. If you have a wood burning fireplace, it is a good idea to stock up on wood before the weather turns cold.

*Section off the house

Close off most of the rooms in your house. You and your family should gather in one main room like the living room or a bedroom to stay warm.  It is easier to try to heat one room than a whole house. 

*Fill up the gas tanks

Fill up your gas tanks before extremely cold weather strikes.  Gas heaters and gas stoves can help you and your family stay warm. They can also be used to prepare food during the power outage. Don’t forget to also fill up the car with gas. Your car can prove to be a source of heat.  You can use its heater for short periods to keep warm.  Just don’t try to sleep inside your car with it running as this could result in carbon monoxide poisoning.

* Flameless candles and flashlights

With the power out, you and your family will need a way of lighting your home.  Purchase several flashlights and flameless candles. Flameless candles eliminate the dangers of a fire. Have enough flashlights to light several rooms in your home. These will provide a source of lighting.

*Cook perishable food

If you have a way of preparing food, go ahead and cook your perishable food. The food can stay cool for a little while because of the freezing weather, but if the power remains off, it will ruin. Once you have consumed all of the perishable items, then start on the canned goods.

*Bottled water

Stock up on bottled water. Power outages can cause the water to also be off. Purchase enough water to last for at least a week. You will need this water for drinking and preparing food.

*Have a landline phone

When the power goes off at my house, the cordless phone is dead. Cell phones are great, but they also needed to be charges. So, keep at least one landline phone in your home.  .  Having one landline phone will ensure that you still have a way of communicating.

*Prevent frostbite

Protect your extremities and move around as much as possible to keep the blood circulating to your extremities.

* First aid kit

Before the cold weather strikes, have your first aid kit stocked and ready to use. This kit should include gloves, alcohol, cotton balls, bandages, Neosporin, gauzes, and other emergency items that can used if an emergency strikes.

Preparation is the key to surviving a winter power outage. So, be prepared!

Money Saving at the Local Grocery Store: Penny-pinching Diva

Penny-pinching Diva Strikes Again!

I know you know by now that I love to save money. I love coupons. I love sales. I love deals. So, when I found some today, I was ecstatic and decided to share the fun. So, here goes.

I went to my local grocery store, Pilgrim’s Food liner~which can be quite expensive~and found some great deals. I found bananas that were on clearance. These bananas were turning brown and about to ruin. So, why would I buy them? Simple. They were an awesome deal. I took the bananas and turned them into 2 great breakfast meals. They became banana nut bread, which I like to eat with my morning cappuccino, and they will become banana pancakes. Here is a great tip. Instead of using pecans in my banana nut bread. I used walnuts. They are cheaper, and once they are chopped up and added to the mix, they taste the same.

Since the holidays are over, I want to try to eat healthier. I found carrots on sale along with collard greens, Dole salad, and spinach. I love all of these, and they are healthy. So, win…win. I also got to receive a Box top for education. (This is an awesome program. Be sure to see if your school participates or to find a school that you can donate them to at http://www.boxtops4education.com/ )The coupon is located on the carrots. This will be collected and given to my local school. See. I am saving money and helping the local school.

(The bread smelt so good. I couldn't wait to eat it. So, I cut off a piece and had a bite.)

I didn’t use any coupons on this trip. Wow! My grocery does double couponing on Wednesdays. I love this, and I usually wait until Wednesdays to make most of my purchases, but today, I was just on a quick grocery run.

Well, my banana nut bread is ready. And, I will be digging in!

How the Holidays Can Ruin Your Sex Life

The Holidays Can Ruin Your Relationship

The holidays are here and you are so excited. You get extra time off from work to spend with your family and that special someone. Just think about it. Extra time to spend with your man. Things couldn’t be better, right? Wrong! The holiday can wreak havoc on your relationship.

Too Much Company

Too much of anything can be bad. And, having too much company can be deadly to your relationship. The holidays are when piles and piles of well-meaning relatives tend to show up. These guests~whether invited or not invited~can put a damper on your love life. For instance, you and your “Boo” want to spend some time together. But, how can you when your sister and all of her kids are running around the house. And, for some reason, these relatives don’t seem to find it necessary to excuse themselves when you and your special someone are trying to have a conversation or be romantic.

No Privacy

Okay, this one is any extension of the last one. During the holiday, it is almost impossible to have some private time. Whether at home or at work, people are everywhere. For some reason, the holidays and all of that sugar seem to dull people’s common sense. Friends and family seem to find it necessary to spend as much time with you as possible. So, they invite themselves along on “trips to the store” a.k.a. “bootie calls”. They bang on locked doors because they want to tell you something cute that your crazy uncle did. They eavesdrop on phone conversations. They snicker when you are kissing your significant other under the mistletoe or on New Year’s Eve.

Fatigue

The next romance killer of the holidays is fatigue. Let’s be honest. The holidays are exhausting. All that shopping, cooking, and pretending to be happy are enough to wear even the Duracell Bunny out. So, who has the energy for “romantic time”? Sure, your mind may be saying “yes”. You may even be in the mood. But, the need for sleep will trump the need for sex any day.

Packed Schedule

The holiday are fun. The holiday are exciting, and we all want to get it all in…the parties, the celebrations, the trips to see the extend family. Well, all of this fun can prevent you and your lover from having any fun. By trying to squeeze in everything, you can sometimes forget to leave time for just you and your spouse.

So, what can you do? Simple. Keep it simple. Don’t overschedule your time off. Say “no” to some of those party invitations. And, if the house is full of noisy, nosy relatives, dish out the money and head to a hotel for a few hours of alone time with your partner.

Keep the Receipts/Do the Survey

Keep the Receipt/Do the Survey

Tips on Saving Money and Getting Things for Free!

Okay, so you went shopping, and you have one of those pesky receipts. They are just trash or extra paper for you to dispose of. Wait. Before you throw that receipt away, read it!

Why in the world would you read a sales receipt? Because it will save you some money. If you take the time to do the survey on the receipt, you can get a lot of free perks. In my book, How to Pay Less for Everything and Even Get Some Things for Free, I talk about how you can save money with those pesky receipts. One great thing about those receipts is that most of the time the companies offer you rewards for taking their surveys.

Popeye’s chicken is currently offering two pieces of chicken and a biscuit with the purchase of a large drink. All of this will cost you about $2.40. Wow! This is great deal considering you are getting a meal for the price of a large drink.

Subway gives you a free cookie in exchange for your input. One cookie may not seem like a lot, but you can add to your lunch as a tasty snack. Remember, the goal is to save money and share my opinion.

Burger King offers you a free whopper just for your opinion. And, I love whoppers. I just pay for some fries and a small drink. Another quick and simple meal for less.

JCPenney offers you a 10% off discount for sharing your experience. This discount is good for the entire day. I used this coupon this weekend~which is tax free weekend~and save a bundle. I was able to purchase some jeans I had been wanting. I got the 10% discount. Plus the jeans were on sale, and I didn’t have to pay any tax. I was happy as a chicken looking at a June bug.

Office Depot gives you a $10.00 coupon that is good on a purchase of qualifying merchandise. I love this one because I just wait until I am out of both my colored and black ink, and then, I use my coupon. This saves me about $5.00 on each ink cartridge.

Wal-Mart, Fred’s, and Walgreen offer to add your name to a monthly drawing for cash and prizes. I am all for prizes. I haven’t won any yet, but I do know someone who has.

So, don’t throw that receipt away. Use it to voice your opinion, share your shopping experience, and get some things for free!

Revenge Sex: The Big Pay Back

 

Sexual Revenge

Okay, you have caught him cheating. Maybe, he confessed. No matter how you found out, you found out. And, it cuts like a knife. You trusted this man with your heart, and how does he repay you? He goes out and does this! Now, what do you do?

Do you leave him? Do you stay with him? Either way, you are out for blood. You want to make him pay for all the nasty things he has done to you. So, what is the best way to hurt him? The first thing that crosses your mind is to wound his pride like he had done yours. You want to humiliate him. And, what better way than to have revenge sex?

Well, girlfriend, let me tell you. That is one of the worst things that you can do. Why? Why should you stay straight when he has gone off the deep end? Because as much as you will hurt him, you will end up hurting yourself.

I get it. You’re mad right now. But, what about later? What happens when the smoke blows over? You will discover that you have been no better than him. And, what if the two of you decide that you want to work things out? How do you think your little indiscretion will play into all of that? If the two of you have children, how will this make them feel? And, most of all, how will you feel?

Yes, you are hurting, and you want to lash out. But, it is not worth it. Believe me. I know. I was the queen of revenge at one time in my life. Thankfully, as I have gotten older, I have gotten wiser. I have learned that having an affair just to punish him always backfires on you. You end up feeling cheap and betrayed. Revenge sex does not kill the pain of his betrayal.

So, what do you do? You find strength in yourself. You turn to God. You turn to your friends. You examine the situation and try to figure out what went wrong. You pick yourself up and move on. You don’t use your body as a pawn in a game.

So, sista, keep your head up! Brighter days are ahead.

The Handwriting on the Wall: Ignoring the Signs of a Break-Up

 

The Handwriting on the Wall

A while back, a young lady called me. She was very upset. In fact, she was literally in tears. Her boyfriend had finally called it off, and she was absolutely devastated. I did all that I could to comfort her and reassure her that everything was going to work out all right. The thing was this. I already knew this day was coming.

The young lady had been giving me calls for the past few months. She had been confiding in me about the problems that she and the young man had been having. And, for me, it was as plain as the nose on my face that things were not going to work out. She was a nice girl. She was pretty. She was working hard to get her education, and she was trying to motivate him to do the same. But, he simply wasn’t as gung-ho as she was about anything. He wasn’t as serious. While she wanted to settle down, he wanted to continue to play around.

I tried to warn her gracefully, but she just didn’t seem to get it. She was always finding a way to justify his behavior. But, the handwriting was on the way. Of course, I am a pretty good bit older than she is, and as the saying goes, “I been there and done that”. So, the break-up was no shock to me.

Well, I said all of that just to say this, “Wake up, ladies. Wake up.” Stop fooling yourselves. When he is not treating you the way that you should be treated…when he has checked out emotionally…when your heart starts whispering that he is being unfaithful…listen to your heart. Listen to your guts. Don’t close your eyes. See the handwriting on the way. Be aware that he is cheating. Be aware that he is getting ready to leave you. I recently wrote an eBook called, Hey Sista, Practical Advice for Women. It is sold on Amazon. In it, I give the warning signs of an impending break-up. Learn the signs. Watch the signs. Follow the signs. Guard your heart!

Knights In Shining Armor

 

Knights in Shining Armor

I can remember reading all those fairytales as a child. I can remember reading about the princess or damsel in distress and the wonderful, knight in shining armor coming to rescue her. I believed those stories and wanted to be rescued. My most of my young life I believed that a man could solve my problems. I kept thinking, “If I can just get married…I would have someone to help me pay these bills.  I would have someone to come home to…someone to talk to about my problems…someone to help me raise my kids.”

Praise God, I have finally woke up. I no longer center my life around my wedding~which has not come~but around what I can do for myself. I look to my own resources. I realize that even if there was a man here, it doesn’t mean that I will have the financial help that I have been longing for or the person to listen to my problems or the person to be here with me raising my children. I am not saying I will never marry, but I am so glad that I realize marriage is not everything. There are no knights in shining armor. Men have problems too. Marriage is a compromise. It would not be all about me and my needs. So, to all those women who are still unconsciously looking for a man to rescue them, I would like to say “Wake up!” Face reality. That man that you are waiting on to save you, maybe waiting on you to save him.

Build yourself up. Don’t spend your life looking for Mr. Right. To be honest, there is no Mr. Right. There are men who are more compatible with us than others. Learn to love yourself. Learn to be happy with the woman that you are. Before you know it, the man who is right for you will show up (if that is what you want).

So, good-bye Cinderella. Good luck Snow White. Good night Sleeping Beauty. No more kissing frogs, Tiana. I am doing just fine.

What Does He Mean When He Says...You're a Nice Girl...You Deserve Better?

 

 

Okay. Some of us have heard these words from the man in our life, and we have wondered just what he meant. In fact, some of us have grab the phone and called our girlfriends for answers. Sadly, all she can tell us is that we are “nice” or that we are “good girls”. Why are we so confused? First, our boo said this without explaining. Second, he said this and didn’t officially break up with us. So, we are left hanging.

When we ask our man about it later, we are not given a straight answer. Sometimes, he may even play dumb and pretend that he doesn’t remember saying these words. So, ladies allow me to enlighten you.
As a woman who has been there and done that, I have just about heard it all. To be honest, I have just about said it all too. Guilty…Guilty…Guilty as charged. When your significant other tells you how nice you are, he means it. You are a nice person. Yeah! Great, right!? Maybe.

When this statement is followed by the acknowledgment that you can do better, you better look out. His hands have been in the cookie jar, and his conscious is acting up. He is tell you in so many words that he has done you wrong and that you are too good for his junk.

Why hasn’t he broken up with you? Simple. You are too good to lose. He doesn’t want to willingly let you go. But, he is not ready to stop doing the crap that he is doing. He still wants to play the field and run home to you. Sometimes, when he is caught red-handed and given an ultimatum, he may even chose to let you go.

How to I know? Because I have been in the same situation. To be honest, I have even told guys this same thing after I have been wading in the mud with my man on the side. I would come back from my rendezvous and realize that I had a good man at home.

So, why would I cheat? Why would your man cheat when he knows that you are a good woman? For the same reasons everybody does:

·         Having an affair can be exciting.

·         Things are a little rocky at home or in the relationship with you. A lover welcomes us with open arms and doesn’t want to know when we are going to pay the bills or stop hanging out with our friends.

·         Things in the bedroom may have gotten boring.

·         He or she makes us feel special. They tell us how beautiful we are. They act like we are the most important person in the world.

So, now you know. What should you do?  Try to have a heart to heart talk with your partner. But, be prepared for him to deny everything.

How to Flirt like a Southern Belle Style

 

Southern women are known for their drawl, their charm, and their flirtatious nature. They can stop a man dead in his tracks with just one look, and they can woo him before he even bats his eyes. If you have ever watched Gone with the Wind, then you have seen a southern belle in action. Scarlett O’Hara was an infamous flirt. How do southern women do it? The following is a guide to flirting southern belle style.

The Eyes Have It

Flirting begins with the eyes. All good southern girls learn from an early age how to make her eyes work for her. And, those eyes don’t have to be blue. All you need to know is how to “smize” (smile with your eyes~a term coined by supermodel Tyra Banks). The first thing you will need to do is look directly at your target. Make your eyes as wide as you can. Then, slowly drop them half way. Go from his eyes to his shoulders and then back up to his eyes again. Raise one of your eyebrows and make your eyes smile. It doesn’t hurt to bat them once or twice. It is also a good idea to know how to wear the right eye make up for maximum effect.

The Lips Say It All

A woman’s lips also play an important part in the flirting process. Let your lips work for you. Once you have his attention, smile. Don’t give him a big silly smile. Make it subtle. The smile should begin in one corner of your mouth like a smirk and then let it go all the way around. Lipstick and lip gloss are your friends. Don’t be afraid to use some. They can help to make your lips exciting.

Talk to Me

Once you have captured him with your eyes and drew him in with your lips, you should then strike up a conversation. You can start it out with something as simple as a “Hello”.  Find something of mutual interest and have a nice, casual conversation. A good southern flirt will center the conversation around the man she is talking to. So, let him talk about himself or things that interest him. Be sure to look either wide-eyed or dreamy eyed.  Act like he is the most important person in the world at that moment.

Touch My Heart

During the course of the conversation, gently touch his arm. Don’t grab him. Make the touch light. It should seem “natural”.

Learning to Walk Away

Finally, a southern girl knows when to walk away. Don’t let the conversation go on too long. Remember, you want to give him something to think about. Leave him wanting more. Politely, excuse yourself. If he is still interested, he will ask for your number or any other way that he can contact you.

Southern women are known for their ability to flirt. Their words drip like honey, and men flock to them. Follow the steps listed above and flirt like a southern belle.

Gift Ideas for Football Fans

Great gift ideas for Football fans

Can’t think of what to get that special person in your life?  Do they love football? If they do, then finding a gift just got easier. The items below make great gifts for any football fan.

*Collapsible quad chair

Who couldn’t use a collapsible quad chair? These are great to use when sitting near the field or to use during those tailgating parties. They are generally inexpensive, and because they are collapsible, they can be taken anywhere.  You can make this chair extra special by purchasing one with your football fan’s favorite team logo on it. 

*Clappers, Cowbells, and Pompoms

Any good football fan will need a noise maker to use when their team makes that touchdown.  Mississippi State University fans use cowbells, but there are other items that are just as much fun. You can have specially designed team clappers or bam bams for your football enthusiast. If your football fan happens to be a female or you don’t want a noise maker, you can opt for pompoms in team colors.

*Team t-shirts and sweatshirts

Team t-shirts are cute and they are a fantastic way to show off that school pride. They go well with jeans, shorts, and turtlenecks. Don’t forget those warm and cozy team sweatshirts. They are perfect for the game and the cold weather.

*Hats and gloves

Football is a cold weather sport. Help keep your football fan warm while they are sitting in the stands with both a warm hat and a pair of gloves. If your football fan likes a professional team, you can find these with team logos also.

*Electric smoker (tailgating)

Tailgating and football go hand in hand. If your football fan likes to tailgate, then an electric smoker can be an ideal gift. There are three different types of smokers: wood burning, charcoal, and propane. Smokers can be used to cook both meats and vegetables at the same time which makes them perfect for tailgating.

*Cooler (tailgating)

Another item that is a tailgating must is a cooler. A cooler can be used to keep drinks and other carefully wrapped dishes like potato salad cool.  All your football fan will have to do is fill it up and head out to the game day party.

*Flat screen television

Let your favorite football fan watch that big game on a new flat screen television.  They can be purchased at any electronics store. They range in price according to size, so it’s easy to get one to fit your budget.

*Memorabilia

Anything with your football enthusiast’s team logo will make a great gift. This includes footballs, flip flops, bracelets, coffee mugs, and figurines.

Football enthusiasts all have one thing in common-they all love the game. When choosing a gift for them, get them something they will love.  Choose one of the gifts from the list above.

Planning a Tailgating Party

How to plan a tailgate party

 

If you are ready for some football, chances are you are also ready for a great tailgating party. If are you thinking about hosting a tailgate party, don’t settle for just another ordinary party.  Have the best tailgate party every.  Don’t know how? Then read on.

*Choose location

When hosting a tailgate party, location is everything. Choose a location that is close enough to the game, but far enough away that you and your buddies can truly enjoy yourself.  A lot of college campuses are banning tailgating in their parking lots, so have a different location in mind just in case. If you do have your tailgate party on the campus parking lot, learn their rules for tailgating. Parks, picnic areas, and beaches are great places to host a tailgate party. You will also need to decide if you will have tables at your party or use the tailgate of your vehicle.

*Decide on the size of the party and menu

Figure out how large your tailgate party will be.  If you are inviting a large number of people, then be sure to you pick a place that is large enough to accommodate your crowd and not interfere with other tailgaters.

*Potluck or Organized Meal

This also a good time to decide if you will prepare all of the food or if you will do potluck. Once you have made this decision, you can decide what type of food you will have at your party. Whether you are doing potluck or doing all the cooking, you will want to carefully plan your menu.

*Prepare some dishes ahead of time

To save time and energy, it is best to prepare some food ahead of time. Marinate your meat and make simple dishes like chili, taco filling, sloppy joes and potato or pasta salads before heading out. Consider how you will keep your food safe from contamination.  Have a specified place to keep your meats and one to keep the rest of your food. Good hand washing is also a must.

*Drinks

You should plan to bring enough soft drinks and water to last football fans throughout the party.  When trying to figure out how many drinks you will need, a good way to estimate is to assume each guest will drink one to two cans per hour of the party. If the weather is cool, you can also prepare hot cocoa or hot coffee.

*Eating utensils

Eat is so easy to forget the plates, cups, paper towels, and other eating utensils.  So, put them at the top of your shopping list. 

*Pack the car

Last, you will need to pack the car or truck.  Put your heavy equipment in first like your smoker, grill, cooler, and deep fryer.  Keep your food dishes away from these items to prevent containers from getting broken.

Football and tailgating go hand in hand. Even though tailgating is an informal party, don’t just throw things together.  Follow the suggestions above and have one of the greatest tailgating parties ever.

How Long Should You Wait for Him to Pop the Question?

How Long Should You Wait for Him to Pop the Question?

(This is my own personal opinion and personal experience. Each relationship is different. )

So, the two of you have been dating for a while…and, I do mean a while. He hasn’t asked you marry him yet even though you get along great. You like his family. His family likes you. He may have even told you that he loves you. You have waited anxiously Christmas after Christmas, birthday after birthday, and Valentine’s Day after Valentine’s Day. You may even be the mother of his child. The two of you may even be living together, so what is the hold-up? When will he pop the question?

Okay, ladies, let’s be honest with ourselves. Men are not like us. They don’t react emotionally. They react logically. They think things through and look at the bigger picture. Instead of worrying about love and spending eternity with us, they worry about paying bills and providing a good, stable home. So, just because he likes you, it doesn’t mean he wants to spend the rest of his life with you.

Yes, you may have given him 10 or more good years. You may have devoted your life to helping him succeed. However, if the two of you have been dating for several years, and he hasn’t asked you yet, look out! He is probably still looking for “Mrs. Right”. What?! You thought it was you. Well, he may not think so.

What makes me say this? Simple. If the man wanted to marry you, he would have by now. Don’t fall for the excuse that he is just trying to establish his career or that he is trying to finish sowing his wild oat. Even if he isn’t aware of it, he is not quite satisfied with you.

How would I know? I spent 6 years of my life waiting on my high school sweetheart. Guess, what? As soon as we broke up, he married someone else within a year. I spent another 10 years waiting for the “Man of My Dreams” to wake up and realize that I was “The One”.  “Mister” still hasn’t woke up, but I have. I have watched countless women do the same thing. But, we don’t have to.

Do a reality check on your relationship. And, don’t be fooled. Just because he bought you the ring, it doesn’t guarantee that he will walk you down the aisle.

What can you do? Simple. Have a heart to heart talk with your man. Ask him about the future of your relationship. Is he thinking about settling down? Does he envision the two of you together when you are old?

If you are satisfied with just being his girlfriend, then great. Stop worrying and let the relationship take its course.

Don’t waste another minute on a dead-end relationship. Decide what you want and verbalize this in a non-threatening way to your partner.

What Does He Mean...

You Say “I Love You. He Says “Let’s Be FWB”

So, you did it. You confess your love to this guy that you have had your eyes and mind on for quite some time. You have been praying and hoping that he felt the same way that you did. It took you a while, but you finally worked up the nerve to proclaim your love. Then, what does he do? Instead of saying that he feels the same way or letting you know that he doesn’t, he suggesting being friends with benefits. What is up?

Okay, siesta. I love you so I will tell you the truth. He means that he likes your body. Maybe he is lonely. Either ways, he has evaluated you and decided that he would like to have sex with you. Same thing as I love you, right? Wrong. At least, he likes me, right? Wrong, again. He doesn’t like you as a person. He likes what he thinks your body can do for him. He likes the prospect of getting you home for dessert. No, he is not considering you as girlfriend or wife material. He is considering you a willing victim. A volunteer to his drama. Don’t fall for it. Don’t agree. Don’t stoop to this level thinking things will change once the two of you hook up. It won’t.

Men place women in categories: girlfriend material, wife material, doable, doable when my boys aren’t around, and no way. You are on his “doable” list. Not one of the first two.

So, what should you do? Tell him, “Thanks but no thanks”, go home have a good cry, and begin to move on. If he comes back later, check to see where his mind is at. If he is ready for a commitment, go for it. But, don’t go along with the game. As my brothers, Stanley and Maurice, love to say “There are no victims in this game, only willing volunteers.” Don’t be a lamb led to the slaughter. Realize you are worth more than that.

Things Married, Chrisitans Shouldn't Say to Single People

As a single woman, I can’t tell you the number of times I have had someone tell me that I am single because there are some things I need to work on. I have been told that while I wait on the “right man”~the man God has specially designed for me~I should work on myself because “you attract what you are”. I have been asked, “What can you bring to the table? What can you offer a man?”

What?! This is so offensive to me that I can’t even express it in words. Why? Right, I have two degrees. Plus, I run my own photography business and write professionally. I am not rolling in money, but I do fairly well. It is a fact that most black women make more than black men. I would love to meet a man (black, white, or whatever color) who can meet me halfway. Next and most importantly, “I like me”. I would love to meet a man who likes to have “his own space” sometimes because I need mine. So, please go hunting, shoot some ball, or spend some time with the boys. I would love to find a man who likes to spend time reading or watching the game. I would love to find someone who enjoys some of the same things I do. I like me.

No, I don’t feel that there is a lot I need to work on. Yes, I can spend all of this wonderful time with God. However, God himself said that it was not good for man to be alone.

Question to all those married people: If I need to spend all of this time with God just because I am single, what about yourself? Does getting married signify that you have got it all together and you are excempt for prayer and fasting? When I look at the married couples I know, so many of them seem so miserable. I wonder if they are spending as much time with God as they are suggesting that I do because I am single.

Being single is not a curse. It is not a disease. For some people, it is a lifestyle choice. For some people, it is a temporary state. For me, it is the place where God has me for the moment. I don’t feel that he has me here because I am a wretched person or because I need to get my career established. Why am I single? I am single because this is God’s design for at this time and at this place. This doesn’t mean that I will be single forever. It simply means that God in his wisdom has me in a holding position, and when he is ready for me to land, he will guide me safely home.

Single, Sexual Being, In Love with God

 

I know the title is crazy, but it is true. I am single. I love God, but I am also a sexual being. I am aware that sex is best enjoyed within marriage. I believe the Bible. However, I will not lie and say that I don’t have sexual desire. This would be hypocrisy. I do want a companion. I want to get married. I want to enjoy sex.

No, I am not advocating premarital sex. But, I am being truthful. I have learned that God knows me. He know my thoughts and my feelings. And, I do have sexual feelings. I believe virginity is valuable, and if I could go back I would. But, that is water under the bridge. What does irritate me is when Christians who are married tell me to save yourself and I know they didn’t. What irritates me are Christian men who tell me not to give men my phone number or tell a man that I am attracted to him. Okay. Maybe. But, I am an independent woman, and I don’t see anything wrong with smiling back at a man I am attracted to.

I try to remain faithful to the cause. But, I am human. I am a sexual being, and I do still have the desire to be with a man sexually. Is this wrong when I love God?

The only person who can answer that is God. So, save all your negative responses. I just decided to be honest~unlike so many Christians out there who are having sex and aren’t married.

7 Simple Ways to Go Frugal

 

Learning how to live frugal is vital in today’s tough economy. Although most people assume living frugal means doing without and suffering, it doesn’t. What it means is smart spending and saving. The following are 7 simple things that you can do to save money and live more frugally.

Cut Coupons

Although it has been said time and again, it is a fact that using coupons will help you save money. You should use coupons to purchase staple items in bulk. Whenever an item that you use regularly is on sale and you have coupons for it, you should buy that item in large quantities. This will ensures that you don’t have to purchase the item again until it goes back on sale.

Sew socks

Who sews socks? When they get a hole in them, the first thing we do is throw them out and buy more, right? No! You don’t throw them out. By throwing out those socks, you are throwing away money. Most hole form at the tip of the sock. So, instead of tossing them in the trash, grab a needle and thread and go to work sewing up that hole. Because the hole is at the tip of the sock, no one will see your needle work anyway.

Pick up pennies

Picking up pennies is also a great way to save a little extra money. Lost pennies are everywhere. Take the time to pick them up. Add them to your piggy bank. After a few months take them out, bag them, and head to the bank. You will be surprise at the amount of money you will have over time. Remember the guy who paid off his house in pennies? Think about it.

Drink more water

Put the carbonated soda down and drink more water. Water is good for the body. It helps keep you hydrated, help to ensure that the brain receives the need amount of oxygen, and keeps the digestive system moving. Water has zero calories, and in most restaurants, it is free. So, instead of ordering a soda that you will be overcharged for, have a glass of water instead.

Buy soda in bulk

If you can’t seem to escape the need for carbonated soda, buy those drinks in bulk. Buying drinks by the case is much cheaper than buy them in single 12 oz. cans. Also, keep a few in your car for those times when you use the drive through. By having some can sodas already in your car, you don’t have to order a drink at the drive through. This will also help to save you money.

Shop consignment

Consignment shops are great places to find quality clothes without paying full price. These gently used clothes are often just as good as those bought from a department store, and they are half the department store price.

Eat out less

Eating out can be expensive. Although some people will beg to differ, it is much cheaper to eat meals at home. Why? The amount of money that you spend on one meal could have been used to prepare a larger meal that you can eat more than once in a day and that can be used for leftovers.

Living frugal doesn’t have to be hard. The things listed above are simple, painless things that you can do to help save money.